*If you are already offended, I highly recommend reading my follow up blog for some clarification instead: http://www.flotrack.org/blog/41112-Round-2-Ultrarunning-vs-Fox-News-FIGHT
My ramblings do not reflect any running store I've previously worked at or are they intended to divide the running community. If not offended and you have a sense of humor, enjoy the read! Cheers :)*
It is time to address the age-old question that everyone has been wordlessly asking themselves over the past few years. Which group is more annoying, CrossFitters or ultrarunners?
In the last few years these two subsets in America’s culture have been growing at a shocking speed. Ultramarathons are selling out at an alarming rate despite their ridiculous entry fees, and empty CrossFit caves seem to be invading commercial parks everywhere.
I’ve seen friends, classmates, family members and patients strutting around with paraphernalia proclaiming things such as, “Marathons are my warm up”, “Black toenails are my friend”, “specialize in nothing, excel in everything”, and a personal favorite, “Out Lift a Runner, Out Run a Lifter”, as it clearly admits taking the middle route between two sports they failed at. But, why the sudden interest in these hobbies? Are all the warrior dashes and muddy buddy parades are sold out?
For ultrarunning, the amplified curiosity was undoubtedly sparked by Christopher McDougall’s precious gem, Born to Waddle. Wait, maybe that was John Bingham?
Regardless, this national bestseller is actually a great read. I zipped through its’ half truths, stories, exaggerated conclusions, weak studies and an overwhelmingly biased opinion towards the superiority of ultrarunners compared to the rest of the running community in just a short 6 months.
For example, this description about Barefoot Ted, stating, “[He] was amazing; he was speeding down the mountain hard on the heels of Luis and Scott [Jurek], two of the best downhillers in the sport. With all that talent pushing up against each other, the pace was getting ferocious.”
I couldn’t help but wonder what this “ferocious” pace must have looked like, were they screaming downhill at a sub 15 minute pace? Sub 12 even?! Have you seen Barefoot Ted? I can only imagine how soiled McDougall would become if he were to witness Deena, Desi, or any high school girl for the matter, run the same trails.
Other false prophets like, Jen Shelton, litter the book with talk about how the Olympic Trials are child’s play. “Dude, seriously,” she said. “The qualifying standard is 2:48. Anyone can make it.”
She then spent more than 4 years attempting to hit the mark...
For CrossFit, I honestly don’t have a hypothesis for why people are so enthralled by it. It is just completely made up. I mean, watch one of their WOD’s and you will see a mob of pudgy frat bros, platinum blonde middle aged moms and out of shape married couples slowly move around an empty warehouse in Fila skeletoes.
And this is a functional fitness revolution? Seriously?
What’s functional about air humping a pull-up bar 6,000 times, doing inverted push-ups until you puke or walk-jogging your way around the building once?
With ultrarmarathons, at least they can loosely be called a real competition. Throw a number on, gear yourself out in 20 lbs of unnecessary crap and then run from point A to point B, consuming a grip of food somewhere mixed in. I witnessed one and it was like watching the episode of Man Vs Food where Adam Richman takes on the Doughman, 50-60 times straight.
Now, the health care practitioner in me wants to encourage any healthy activity that will lead our society away from the immobile couch slithering gamers we have become epitomized as. But for these silly games?
Having worked at a retail running store I have been blessed to listen to accounts of both your everyday CrossFitter and ultrarunner. I’ve listened to tales of raw potatoes being the best source of sodium, the key to getting over the “85 mile hump” is drinking a mixture of olive oil and chicken broth, how PowerBars are not paleo, and that I need to switch to using Nike Frees because they are more natural and will drastically improve my snatch.
With both groups they paraded around with pride and come off demanding of praise. To me all the sound produced from their face simply became white noise in my head.
So to answer my question I will give the nod to CrossFitters. FAT shows they have just out leaned ultrarunners at the line. At least ultrarunners are doing some bizarre branched mutation of the sport I love and compete in whereas, no matter how hard I try, I cannot comprehend why so many people get off on this strange ritual CrossFitters casually participate in biweekly. ;)
@timtollefson
www.timtollefson.wordpress.com
My ramblings do not reflect any running store I've previously worked at or are they intended to divide the running community. If not offended and you have a sense of humor, enjoy the read! Cheers :)*
It is time to address the age-old question that everyone has been wordlessly asking themselves over the past few years. Which group is more annoying, CrossFitters or ultrarunners?
In the last few years these two subsets in America’s culture have been growing at a shocking speed. Ultramarathons are selling out at an alarming rate despite their ridiculous entry fees, and empty CrossFit caves seem to be invading commercial parks everywhere.
I’ve seen friends, classmates, family members and patients strutting around with paraphernalia proclaiming things such as, “Marathons are my warm up”, “Black toenails are my friend”, “specialize in nothing, excel in everything”, and a personal favorite, “Out Lift a Runner, Out Run a Lifter”, as it clearly admits taking the middle route between two sports they failed at. But, why the sudden interest in these hobbies? Are all the warrior dashes and muddy buddy parades are sold out?
For ultrarunning, the amplified curiosity was undoubtedly sparked by Christopher McDougall’s precious gem, Born to Waddle. Wait, maybe that was John Bingham?
Regardless, this national bestseller is actually a great read. I zipped through its’ half truths, stories, exaggerated conclusions, weak studies and an overwhelmingly biased opinion towards the superiority of ultrarunners compared to the rest of the running community in just a short 6 months.
For example, this description about Barefoot Ted, stating, “[He] was amazing; he was speeding down the mountain hard on the heels of Luis and Scott [Jurek], two of the best downhillers in the sport. With all that talent pushing up against each other, the pace was getting ferocious.”
I couldn’t help but wonder what this “ferocious” pace must have looked like, were they screaming downhill at a sub 15 minute pace? Sub 12 even?! Have you seen Barefoot Ted? I can only imagine how soiled McDougall would become if he were to witness Deena, Desi, or any high school girl for the matter, run the same trails.
Other false prophets like, Jen Shelton, litter the book with talk about how the Olympic Trials are child’s play. “Dude, seriously,” she said. “The qualifying standard is 2:48. Anyone can make it.”
She then spent more than 4 years attempting to hit the mark...
For CrossFit, I honestly don’t have a hypothesis for why people are so enthralled by it. It is just completely made up. I mean, watch one of their WOD’s and you will see a mob of pudgy frat bros, platinum blonde middle aged moms and out of shape married couples slowly move around an empty warehouse in Fila skeletoes.
And this is a functional fitness revolution? Seriously?
What’s functional about air humping a pull-up bar 6,000 times, doing inverted push-ups until you puke or walk-jogging your way around the building once?
With ultrarmarathons, at least they can loosely be called a real competition. Throw a number on, gear yourself out in 20 lbs of unnecessary crap and then run from point A to point B, consuming a grip of food somewhere mixed in. I witnessed one and it was like watching the episode of Man Vs Food where Adam Richman takes on the Doughman, 50-60 times straight.
Now, the health care practitioner in me wants to encourage any healthy activity that will lead our society away from the immobile couch slithering gamers we have become epitomized as. But for these silly games?
Having worked at a retail running store I have been blessed to listen to accounts of both your everyday CrossFitter and ultrarunner. I’ve listened to tales of raw potatoes being the best source of sodium, the key to getting over the “85 mile hump” is drinking a mixture of olive oil and chicken broth, how PowerBars are not paleo, and that I need to switch to using Nike Frees because they are more natural and will drastically improve my snatch.
With both groups they paraded around with pride and come off demanding of praise. To me all the sound produced from their face simply became white noise in my head.
So to answer my question I will give the nod to CrossFitters. FAT shows they have just out leaned ultrarunners at the line. At least ultrarunners are doing some bizarre branched mutation of the sport I love and compete in whereas, no matter how hard I try, I cannot comprehend why so many people get off on this strange ritual CrossFitters casually participate in biweekly. ;)
@timtollefson
www.timtollefson.wordpress.com
You come off as a huge douche. A lot of people are now rooting against you. You should do your next article on how masters runners are losers because they can only beat old guys. Keep making friends and inspiring people...