Track and Field Blogs - David Flaugher

Thank you for your recent proposal regarding a scheduled date for football between the University of Louisville and the THE University of Kentucky.

As you know we are unable to grant this request because the date conflicts with our preparation for a previously scheduled game with the intramural team of the Ky Womens Correctional Institute. Coach Brooks feels that his full attention should be given to this up and coming football power.

We feel it only fair to bring you up to date on other possible schedule problems. Please see the list below for dates and times that our team will not be available.

Sundays: (all day) SEC powerhouses such as ourselves feel compelled to observe the sabbath and not participate in any sporting events on the Lords Day. (the exception to this of course is NASCAR)
Monday Mornings: All Monday mornings from this point until the end of time are dedicated to the ritualistic worship of Richie (Reeecheee for you Eastern UK fans) Farmer.
Monday Afternoons and Evening: This time is reserved for the weekly "burning in effigy" of a Rick Pitino doll.
Tuesday's All Day: All Tuesdays are spent in day long silence as all of the Wildcat faithful reflect on how much they hate Christian Laettner.
Wednesday 6 a.m to Midnight: Weekly pep rally featuring Ashley Judd ( I cant miss that)
Thursdays: Special request from Rich Brooks, so that he may dine at the Golden Corral during the discounted AARP time. (this and the following nap are a day long activity)
Fridays: This day is totally committed to lining up dates for Billy Clyde.
Saturdays: We must reserve this day to allow for the attorneys to arrange bail for Billy Clyde.

As you can see we at THE University of Kentucky have a very busy schedule which leaves us little free time (for the likes of you). It appears that the only available time would be a Wednesday in May between Midnight and 6 a.m. .

A few other minor stipulations regarding this game:
There shall be no cameras or reporters allowed.
The game must be played on an indoor basketball court.
UK must be declared the winner, regardless of the actual outcome.

Best Regards,

Mitch Barnhart